September 6, 2012

This morning I had a good cry over my eldest son, Austin. I learned from very kind classmates and those who are truly nice to him that he had been bullied by Bryan and even Alex, who used to be so nice to my son.

my AUSTIN upfront during Children's International
Day parade

Austin’s nature is so benevolent, peaceful and quiet that he never gets back at whoever offends him. I guess that’s why the rowdy boys pick on my son. Because he’s small, the youngest of the class [he’s in grade three now at age seven], and not retaliating, little fellows like him are often the target; the easy, poor target. Why I cried over this age-old school-kids-issue is because my heart went out to him.

happy days with precious Teacher Tina Diaz
[Austin crossed his face]

My own childhood was one that’s very far from being bullied; I wasn’t the bully either. I was one who was respected because mom was a doctor who had a hospital ran by dad; one who was looked up to because of being unbiased [I am friends with both the well-off and the less fortunate and everyone in between] and one who was often approached with because my eyes naturally twinkle like smiling eyes [that’s even when I’m irate]. The boisterous lot cannot bother me because I give them the sharp twinkle look. My eyes speak louder than my mouth. There was no need for me to defend myself or get back because one look at a bully’s attempt is enough to back-off. It works every time…up to this very moment. God gave me the spiky gaze I just love to use when it’s called for.

my lovable boy in the leftmost with friends and classmates

I never picked a fight at school and work and was never provoked. All the tormentors do not seem to come my way. Their presence was virtually non-existent. I guess at an early age I learned to dodge them on purpose. So today I cried because I wasn’t bullied before yet I know what it feels like because it’s pitiful to look at the face of a child who is dejected. Especially if that child is yours. Mommy instincts kick up.

Austin's face...a picture of kindness
taken from his extremely kind dad
[mind you! not me]

When I learned from the classmates about the ordeals my son was going through, I immediately reported the situation to the teachers and called Alex’s mom who happened to be my friend. I left the situation to the authorities but I stayed the whole day today at the school.

This morning my vulnerability was exposed. I drove to my favorite church, the Redemptorist. I did my ceremonial candle-lighting prior to praying at the PEA. There was a couple there so I prayed solemnly. As soon as they got out, my tears immediately poured. And I was crying like a beaten woman. I was telling God please don’t let my son’s self esteem be stepped upon!!! We don’t squash their egos at home. Don’t let them be in this place.

teachers' and kids' artworks in WIS...
beautiful!!

As I said, this is an old-age school issue. It’s a normal thing but normal as is it is, I don’t want it to happen to my kids...not to any kid. I pity the child who is a victim of squashed esteem…even that of the bully.

The day will end in a few minutes from now. Tomorrow is another day. Just like when I tackle daily operations in the spa, I need to tackle daily ordeals in school and at home. And I mean daily. My God! I don’t own my time but it has to be this way. To sacrifice something is the way to any achievement. For me it has to be my down-time. I no longer have the luxury of lengthy downtimes. I almost always have my up-and-about times. Alive and kicking I should always be…